The Church

Even being a Christian, I have never worn the church comfortably. I am also never comfortable when being labeled a "church-goer". Why? Because everyone in church is always in their "sunday best". Everyone trying to look their best, everyone trying to look perfect. When faced with something like that I feel uneasy.

Why is that so? Sadly, I believe we are afraid of being judged by our Christian peers. And is this fear justified? I believe it is. We Christians are a quite judging lot. We judge about what is happening, about what other churches are doing, about a certain pastor who decided to be a celebrity, about how a fellow brother or sister did something wrong etc... With people like this, it is little wonder that people try to look their best in front of their Christian peers. One false move will provoke a wave of backlash filled with gossip, funny looks and people who judge prematurely. I am not saying I am not on occasion guilty of a lot of judging myself but as I start to learn the reasons for the existence of the church and compare it with the state of the church today. I have discovered the error of my ways; it has also left me cold and disillusioned.

To illustrate my point a bit better, I quote from an article called the “The Midnight Church” which talks about an organization called the “AA” (Alcoholics Anonymous);

“… The ‘sharing time’ was like a textbook small group, marked by compassionate listening, warm responses, and many hugs. Introductions went like this: ‘Hi, I’m Tom, and I am an alcoholic and a drug addict.’ Instantly everyone shouted out in unison like a Greek chorus, ‘Hi, Tom!’ Each person attending gave a progress report on their battle with addiction…”

“… My friend freely admits that AA has replaced the church for him… The church seems irrelevant vapid, and gutless to him. Others in the group explain their resistance (of seeking the church for help) by recounting stories of rejection, judgment, ‘a guilt trip’. A local church is the last place they would stand up and declare, ‘Hi, I’m Tom, and I am an alcoholic and a drug addict.’ No one would holler back, ‘Hi Tom!’”

When the author asked his AA going friend what does AA have that is missing in the church, his friend answered;

“None of us can make it on our own, isn’t that why Jesus came? Yet most church people give off a self-satisfied air of piety or superiority. I don’t sense them consciously leaning on God or each other. Their lives appear to be in order. An alcoholic who goes to church feels inferior and incomplete. It’s a funny thing, what I hate most about myself, my alcoholism, was the one thing God used to bring me back to him. Because of it, I know I can’t survive without Him. Maybe that is the redeeming value of alcoholics. Maybe God is calling us alcoholics to teach the saints what it means to be dependent on Him and on His community on earth.”

This is a lesson we should all take to heart.

Meditation

In my loneliness,
When you're gone and I'm all by myself,
And I need your caress
I just think of you,
And the thought of you holding me near,
Makes my loneliness soon disappear

Though you're far away,
I have only to close my eyes,
And you are back to stay,
I just close my eyes,
And the sadness that missing you brings ,
Soon is gone and this heart of mine sings,
Yes I love you so,
And that for me is all I need to know,
I will wait for you,
Til the sun falls from out of the sky,
For what else can I do
I will wait for you meditating,
How sweet life will be,
When you come back to me

The Gay Issue

Following the news these few months, you will no doubt notice that very now and then, the issue of legalising same sex marriages and homosexuality have come out and made the news. Be it a same sex marriage of a certain high profile celebrity couple or the remarks made by our very own MM Lee during a certain public function. The forums in the newspapers will come abuzz with debate about what this person did or what that person said about the gay issue without fail.

I am glad that all the articles and public debate I have come across so far in Singapore have been pragmatic and intelligent which is more than I can say for America where it has descended into a political and religious farce. Which begs the question, does religion have any place in the public debate on social issues in our postmodern world?

Firstly, I believe religion does NOT have a place in such a debate because not everyone goes by the same standard nowadays. This differing of social values and standards among individuals is a fact in our postmodern world which we can't deny. Postmodernism can be both good and bad for Christians like me because while other people can't impose upon me their social values and standards, I also can't impose my on them. This is a far cry from the days of the Roman Empire and the Middle Ages where it is the Church in Rome that imposes social values and standards on all, any deviation from those standards would be met with harsh consequences. As such I can't tell people that homosexuality is wrong just because the Bible says so because not all believe in the Bible or accept its laws and commandments. In fact I might look rather ignorant and stupid.

But after all that is said there is still some good in all this. Being influence by the things we believe in we as Christians can offer our point of view about this issue, but we must be practical and logical about it and not start waving Bibles and crosses shouting slogans about gays burning in hell. We as Christians must present an argument on how and why homosexuality is wrong and what harm it will do to the family unit and society at large rather than preaching fire and brimstone without sense. I believe that there is a way to get the Bible's message about homosexuality across without religious rhetoric and pushing into people's faces, doing that will only turn more people away.

Paul said in Corinthians that, "everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial." Therefore we must show how accepting homosexuality is NOT beneficial and present people with the one and only alternative. Religion might not have a place in a postmodern world, but there is always a chance to slip it in.

Jazz

A lot of people have asked me why I listen to music that even my grandfather would find old fashioned. The thing is I don't really have an answer. Jazz just simply makes me feel how I think good music should make me feel. Whether it is the old multi-melodic syncopations of New Orleans Jazz or the modern Jazz done by people like Paris Match or Jazzinho, it does not matter which era the Jazz is from, as long as its Jazz it will sound right to me. Which is a lot more than I can say about certain christian music these days.

Of course I do have my favourites and preferences, but as I sat at the table with my friend at Jazz@Southbridge last week, all the music the band was playing sounded right. Their rendition of old classics like "desafinados" and "blue bossa" was spot on and flawless. I did, on a few occasions, challenge myself to put into words my feelings about Jazz only to find myself even more at a lost for words.

Fact is, I love Jazz, maybe a bit too much. But through Jazz, I think I have learnt a thing or two about love and how you should love. God willing, I pray that I can challenge myself to put into words my feelings about God's grace and mercy only to find myself even more at a lost for words. But I won't be truly lost, because God will find the words for me.

Japan

I spent the whole of last week in Japan. Although I am not caught up with the Japanese craze like some of my peers, I had one thing in mind... Paris Match. Since I could not get their cds here in Singapore, I was about to buy up all of their cds I could get my hands on. I got 3. :) Although Japan is a beautiful country with beautiful people, home is always the best. Here are some pictures...

Entrance to the main Park at Ueda (lots of cherry blossoms)

Thats me!

Same park

Cherry Blossom tree

A factory I visited

View from my hotel room at Ueda

A huge underground shopping mall at Tokyo

Paris Match's latest album "Our Favourtie Pop" I bought this among others

Here's where I found it!

300

I watched 300 with an old friend of mine on Monday. I enjoyed the company and the movie as well. The movie was basically adapted from the Frank Miller graphic novel which was in turn taken from the Battle of Thermopylae where King Leonidas of Sparta managed to hold off a Persian Army numbering hundreds of thousands with only three hundred men. King Leonidas held out for two days and would have lasted longer if it wasn't for a traitor in their mists.

300 was not without its controversy. Splashed over the front page of the world section of a recent issue of the Straits Times was an article about Iranian leaders making a big fuss and protesting about how the Persians in the movie were depicted. Decadent, gluttonous and sexually deviant. In fact, a certain prominent Iranian leader was quoted as saying that the movie was a propaganda tool of the west to villanize Iranians Now you might be asking why would Iranians make a big fuss about how Persians were depicted in some movie, it is because Iranians consider themselves modern Persians.

It is of course understandable how something like that would cause offence, but if the Iranian leaders stayed silent and did not stir up this huge fuss, I don't think people would link modern Iranians to ancient Persians. Yes, given that it is historical fact that Iranians have Persian ancestory, it is still a stretch of imagination for any layman to form such an association. Most of us would just enjoy the movie as it is. Furthermore, any movie, even those based on real events would have exggerated their storylines for dramatic purposes, artistic license so to speak. In fact, stirring up such a huge fuss would only lend credit to such an association.

So I guess this goes to show that even if you are offended by something somebody did, a little tolerance and silence would go a long way to make you look good.

Influences Part 2

A lot of people think that philosophy can only be learnt through reading super dense and hard to understand books that are too thick for own good, the kind of books that you can kill people with by throwing it at them. That could not be further from the truth. Lessons in philosophy can also be learnt through novels and story books that are easy and enjoyable to read. In fact through reading this kind of books you might be learning philosophy without even knowing about it. Such is the power of subtlety.

But it is not a book, but a series of books I read that made an impression on me. In fact the blog you are reading now actually pays a small tribute to these series of books. I am talking about the HHGG(Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy) series of books written by Douglas Adams. He wrote five in total. There are numerous multiple subplots to the story so it is difficult to summarise in detail (you will have to read the book to find out more) but the main plot (which is set in our modern era) involves a human called Arthur Dent who is forced to travel the galaxy as a hitch hiker because earth has just been blown up and he is the only survivor.

The character that made the deepest impression on me was a robot named Marvin. According to the book, Marvin was built with "Genuine People Personalities" technology and was the most advanced robot ever built... period. He is in fact 50,000 times more intelligent than any human and even that is an understatement. Marvin often appears to be depressed and bored throughout the book series because no task he could be given would occupy even the tiniest fraction of his vast intellect and that is the true horror of Marvin's existence. In fact, there is only one time he seemed to appear happy, after seeing "God's last message to creation" after which he died.

I think Marvin is the most human character in the book even though he is a robot. We humans often feel sad and depressed even though we have everything we could ever want in life, and a little message from God no matter how nonsensical is all it takes to make all the sadness go away even though we might be staring death in the face. I find it wierd that Douglas Adams who is a fiercely atheistic man would write a character like Marvin into his novels. Perhaps in writing the character of Marvin, he unintentionally let his guard down and acknowledge that there is a human need for God no matter how atheistic one might be. Food for thought

Interesting Proposition...

I was in Kuala Lumpur with both my bosses for a business trip yesterday. It was a pretty ordinary trip until the drive back to Singapore. Stopping at a hawker centre for dinner my boss offered me a very interesting proposition. Although I don't think it would be wise to reveal the details right now I can say that it will have very positive effect on my career prospects but it will also have a very profound impact on my personal life. Suffice it to say that it was very tempting.

My job has been great so far, a profound blessing. And although I gave a tentative 'yes' to my boss' proposition I have yet to ask God about it. All the things God has done for me after my NS has left me nothing but thankful and it almost makes me 'pai seh' to ask for more, which is why I don't. So perhaps taking on this proposition might be a bit too greedy, it is also a double-edged sword. Now is perhaps a good time to ask God for some wisdom and guidance.

Chinese New Year

Here in Singapore where the Chinese make up most of the population, Chinese New Year is celebrated more so than the actual new year itself. This year is no exception, I have done more than my fair share of relative visiting and "Ang Bao" collecting. Most of the relatives you see in the Chinese New Year holidays are those you only get to see on Chinese New Year, you only see them once a year. Which gives you a huge sense of perspective because the same people playing "catching" with you in the void deck of your flat a little while back are now getting married and having children. It really blows my mind when I wonder where the heck all those years went.

But Chinese New Year also brings its fair share of woes. Nosey relatives will make it a point to ask you the dreaded question before every "Ang Bao" presentation,

"So How? Got girlfriend or not?"

"Err... no..." I would reply.

My Aunt closed in for the kill...

"How can?! You so good looking how come got no girlfriend! You bluffing me right?"

Sensing that her weapons were being fired, I raised my shields,

"No I am not... nowadays girls go for money not looks, maybe if you are not so stingy with your 'Ang Bao' I might be able to afford one." I said jokingly.

Knowing that her weapons had no effect she disenaged,

"wah... still as cheeky as ever..." she said as she handed me her "Ang Bao".

With that, I said my thanks and moved on with my shields still holding... but just barely.

For me personally, I don't even think I am ready for a relationship much less a marriage. But with marriage being a cornerstone of Chinese tradition and the tendancy of relatives on my mum's side to marry young... very young, well lets just say that you can't argue with tradition, you just have to live with it.

Equality?!

I remember watching one episode of the sitcom called “The Office" on Arts Central. In it, the boss of the office who was basically self-centered and ego-centric, was the first to dash out for safety at the sound of a fire alarm while the others tried to help each other to evacuate and let the women go first. When brought to account for that self-centered and cowardly act, he had this to say, "Women and men are equal in the workplace so if I let the women go first I will have a lawsuit on my hands." Although it was said for comedic effect, I felt that it reveals a certain amount of hypocrisy.

Humanity has been trying to achieve some kind of equality for ages and at all levels whether it be race, gender, opportunities for education etc... We had some degree of success with regards to that but has the pursuit of equality turned us into a society of hypocrites?

Take the workplace for example; an employee can sue an employer for discrimination and receive certain compensations if the case is won. That is fair because the employee was being discriminated against and unequally treated, but what if it was the exact opposite whereby an employee was given preferential treatment and he or she has certain perks and privileges not available to another employee in the same position. Would he or she sue the employer for preferential treatment? Isn’t he or she unequally treated as well?

I guess the problem with the “doctrine of equality” (so to speak) is how we use it. We only pursue equality in areas that benefit us and turn a blind eye to it in the areas where we stand to lose out. If that is the case then the word “equality” when used in that light becomes a misnomer. That is why so many double standards arise in the world when we try to make things equal, which allows the root of hypocrisy to grow leading only to the promotion of self-interest. That being the case, I guess nothing is strictly equal.