Thankfulness

Okay, I am not so sure if that is a word but it sort of expresses what I want to say in this post. I do not pretend to know God's Will for my life or whether i am following it. How does one know anyway? In following God's Will, some people have suffered greatly while others prospered greatly. So is God's Will for my life the suffering kind or the prospering kind? (I sure hope it is the latter. Lol!). How do I know I am following His Will? Is it when things go wrong or when things go well in my life?

All along in my life, I have taken a very passive "go with the flow" kind of attitude. Mostly sorting out things for myself and making the sensible choice when needed. Sure, one must always consult God for guidance and wisdom when making a decision. The problem is that some people always expect answers clearly stating what needs to be done from steps 1 to 10. I don't think that is how God does things all the time.

I remember when I was still in my old church years ago. A leader once told me that sometimes God gives us the wisdom to sort things out for ourselves. At times, a lot of decisions we have to make are pretty straightforward and logical and God does not need to come in the form of a "burning bush" to tell us what to do. If you were to put it in perspective, what would you do if God really does appear to you that way? Moses' first reply to God was to ask Him to send somebody else into Egypt instead of him. What would be your reply to God if He really does appear before you?

There are a lot of things I do not know about my christian walk or what God has in mind for my life. It is not a perfect life and I have come to regret certain decisions that I have made, I am sure I have strayed on more than one location and screwed up certain things badly. But through it all, I feel blessed. Whether or not I have strayed or tolled the line, God has seen it fit to bless me because of His grace and mercy. I still have a roof over my head, good health for me and my loved ones, food to eat and money to buy the things I need and want. I thank God for the little things in life. Don't get me wrong, I am not trying to downplay miracles here, but I have learnt that when all things are considered equal it is the above-mentioned "little things" that are the most fragile, mostly taken for granted and most easily taken away.

I thank God that His blessings and how much of it He gives are not proportional to how closely I follow His Will. If not, most of us might be in deep shit already. I guess God will reveal His Will bit by bit to me when the time comes. But in the mist of that, I am thankful that I am blessed and even when things go wrong, there is still a lot to be thankful for.